Out of mind

We all pretend we've put things behind us. But true forgiveness isn't all about really getting those things behind us, I don't think, but rather specifically acknowledging that the issue is done and truly forgiven. You can't just nod and smile and expect it to mean "We're good," but in order to really wash that slate, the more helpful thing to do is talk to the person and say, "Thanks for coming clean to me about stealing my rotary phone. I had a tough time when I realized it was you, but I realized that it was just an object, plus, we use cell phones now, so I just wanted to let you know I'm sorry I froze you out these last few days, and I absolutely forgive you."

I know, I know, it's more awkward to actually say the words, but in the long run, isn't it worth it? I know, for my part at least, that I always feel much better when I've actually talked through the issues with someone. Maybe I've wronged them--well, I'd rather talk to them instead of just secretly hoping they'll forgive and forget. It's tough to go through life just sort of assuming that EllenMae has forgiven me for that time I ruined her bridesmaid dress, but always secretly wondering why she shys away from we when I'm holding kool-aid. It's better to talk to her, to hear the forgiveness. At least, in my opinion.

I don't know, maybe you guys would rather avoid the awkward talk and move on. I certainly prefer not to have the awkward talk, but the relief of knowing that it's over is better, in my opinion.

Just something I was thinking about in my "spare time."