Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Things that terrify me

1)  When a tree has a blight and the leaves have those terrible bumps.  I literally can't stand to look at that.  It makes me want to just... run away or something.  Honestly, it's terrifying.

2)  When you realize that a situation is dangerous.  You know the one.  An angry car is tailing you, and the driver might just ram you off the road.  For their own personal enjoyment.  At the expense of your life.

3)  Change.  There is nothing quite like realizing that everything is out of your control, and only the Lord knows what is happening.  I know it's reassuring to know that HE knows, but the fact that I don't know terrifies me.

4)  Being outside of the Lord's will.  Because sometimes I do things that seem to make sense at the time, and then I realize that I'm just making it up as I go along.

5)  This point removed.  Just because.

6)  That moment when your heart stops because you think you heard some terrible news but actually you just have a hearing problem and everything is fine.  I like the everything-is-fine part, but the wait-WHAT? moment freaks me out.

7)  Myself.  I'm happy that the old man is dead and all that, but I'm still firmly attached to my flesh.  Sort of wish I weren't.  I hate that I'm capable of so much sin.  I'm not trying to be dramatic, but seriously, the flesh ruins a lot of stuff.  Stupid free will...

8)  The realization that I've made no significant headway in life.  And after 2+ decades I probably know less about what I want to do with my life than when I had just a few years of life under my belt.  When I was young, it all made sense.  Then I grew up and realized that my plans mean nothing whatsoever.

All in all, it's a good thing that God hasn't given me a spirit of fear.  Also, that He's given me a sound mind.  Otherwise, I would let all this stuff get to my head.  Especially that leaf thing.  Seriously...

1 comment:

Firefly said...

Are you in my head? No, seriously. Are you.