Oxen

One verse that is recited as if a mantra about our house is Proverbs 14:4, the verse that goes, "Where no oxen are, the crib is clean." We don't just quote this because we used to have kids over to our house for Bible study who thought it was somehow appropriate to call our house "God's Crib" because, you know, I guess our house was the hip version of God's house. Not sure why...

Anyhow, we use this verse to stay encouraged when our Sunday School events go a little crazy. Police had to come? This means the crib is used, people, this is fine. Kids are fighting? That means the kids are there, at Sunday School, so that's good. Sure, everything feels like a mess, but it means there's potential, there's an effort, and there's an outreach. Sometimes it's hard to appreciate the chaos, but fact is, chaos means that things are happening! As crazy as things get sometimes, we still prefer the crazy times to the times when nobody even shows up to Sunday School. That happens, by the way. Sometimes each class will only have one or two kids, and all the Sunday School teachers feel quite bereft of our usual Sunday Adventures.

That's mostly in the summer, for some reason. Kids come more during the school year.

And Hobby Class, for instance, where last week I picked up 14 kids, and this week only two. Last week there was more chaos (and more police cars), but I think I liked it better. But numbers aren't what matter, the outcome is what matters: that a child might come to know the Lord Jesus Christ as their own personal Saviour. That's what matters.

So anyhow, if something has you discouraged because the situation seems out of control, just remember the verse we love so well in our household and bear in mind that it's only a mess because you're making the effort. If all else fails, refer to your home as a "crib." All the cool kids do.

Evil, in root form

I rant about money all the time: how much I hate it, hate to spend it, love to spend it, wish I didn't simultaneously love and hate to spend it, that sort of thing. But in general, and especially having the job I have (word to the wise: your insurance will cost less if you have a better credit score!), I'm thankful for what I do know/feel about money.

Before I go on, don't think that I've learned all my money stuff from the radio or work. My family is full of wise people who are awesome at managing money. I have an aunt who saved a bunch of money before she got married and single-handedly put the down payment on their first house. She is held up as a pinnacle of virtue in our household; someone to live up to, if possible.

Back in the day I used to listen to Money Matters on the radio pretty much every day while I was making supper. That, of course, was back when it was actually called Money Matters, and back when Howard Dayton did the show, and back when I had time to make supper. So, back when the show was cool and I had enough time to listen to money management radio shows. By the way, to all of you Dave Ramsey enthusiasts out there, I still like Howard Dayton better. Sorry.

But it was a really good thing for me, I think. My friend mrg and I used to talk about mortgages and loans and other things we didn't really understand, but because we nerdily listened to such money programs, we at least felt mildly comfortable with it all. Even now I don't really understand all the stuff with Living Wills and Revocable Trusts, but at least I know something. Ish.

So I dutifully went out and got myself a credit card earlier this year, just so I could start having some sort of credit history (the whole insurance company mindset does something to me, I tell you what). It's strange to think that you have to spend money to show that you're good at it, I guess, but it's how these things go.

But my dad and I were talking about money the other day, because I'd missed a talk he'd given about money, and I wanted him to fill me in on what I missed, and *drum roll* he was explaining how budgeting is bad. For a second I was quite confused, because that's what I hear on Moody Radio all the time: Have a budget! Manage your money wisely! But my dad has a great point. Most people create a budget based on how much money they have, and work out from there. Uh, as my dad points out, when you do that, you're basically allowing yourself to spend most (if not all) of the money you make. Just live simply, WELL within your means, and save the rest. Well, save and give back to the Lord--also hugely important (also emphasized by Moody Radio and my dad all the time).

But I've been thinking about it recently, because I've been trying to save pretty much all of my money these days, less necessary evils (prizes for my SS class, gas, etc. etc.), and it's sort of awesome to do my online banking and see very very few debit or credit card purchases each month. Woo hoo!

Things that keep me busy

No sooner did I comment to my friend Rachel that I was finally blogging again then I pretty much stopped blogging. To my credit, I've been busy. We passed the anniversary of my brother's ex-birthday, we passed my birthday, I went away for a long weekend (Columbus Day is a holiday in my books!), and in general, have been sleeping a lot.

Being a year older doesn't feel different at all, I'm not going to lie. It never does, but since this was a monumental year, one that required me to renew my license and such, I though perhaps it was as big a deal as everyone said.

Not so much.

Anyhow, it's all good. Each day brings new blessings, each day brings new challenges. Seems to, anyhow. It's a good feeling, knowing that no matter where life takes me, or what it hands me, I've got the Lord on my side. Whom shall I fear? Yeah, that's what I thought.

Oh, Romeo

Fact: I think the story of Romeo and Juliet is stupid. Fact: Taylor Swift's re-envisioning of the story doesn't really impress me. Fact: maybe it's just because I'm not hopelessly romantic enough, but the whole premise is insane.

You meet, fall in love, can't live without one another, and prove it by dying because you can't be together. Juliet, are you sure you knew this guy? It had only been a couple of days (hours?) before you decided you were in love with him. Romeo, you obviously had no concept of.... well, let's put it this way. Juliet was 13, you were probably not too much older, let's just say you were 17 or 18. You had your whole life in front of you, Romeo, but you chose to throw it all away over a girl barely in her teens. Seriously, mister, get real.

I know you both thought you were smart enough to have figured out the world and its many nuances, but the killing.... WHAT? Obviously you weren't saved, because I, for one, have so much more to live for! I have a life in Christ, and I like to think that I wouldn't throw that away over something as stupid as someone you hardly even knew.

In other news, I just read a news article that declared that it was actually scientifically proven that you can fall in love at first sight. Weird.

Library loyalty

I have several library cards, for my several libraries, but there are only two that I really use enough to have memorized the library numbers. I like them both a lot, and really, my primary choice would be the library I grew up with (even though the other library, the one by work, is the one at which I want to get married). Only problem is, practicality has been winning out recently: I've been using my work library most, because I can go there on lunch break, plus, if I put a hold on an item I have a week to pick up the item, as opposed to my other library, where I only have three days.

It's rough! I feel like I'm cheating on my childhood library by using this other one. It's not a good feeling, either. I'd use the other library all the time if I could, but alas, life gets in the way.

On the plus side, I do have a greater selection of books to choose from! Dear Libraries, you were the best idea ever. Love, Me.

Well then

Dear World,

I'm sorry. I was not sleeping, and apparently decided it would be a good idea to write whatever I was thinking. This is why I have a journal, so I'm not sure why I chose to share with the world, instead of myself. Either way, it amuses me, so I've left it.

Love,
Jo

Jumble

Sometimes in my head the thoughts don't come clearly. Especially late at night, when I lay awake and think and I'm sure that if I just thought hard enough, I could categorize my life into neat little boxes, all the beads sorted out separately, so there aren't any orange ones in the purple box, or blue ones with the yellows. It's not possible of course (though hope springs eternal), but life would be more tidy, less bother. Not that life was meant to be a bother, of course, but it sometimes feels like that ride when you were a kid and you're spinning all around and you desperately want to put your arms up in the air, because in the pictures it looks like so much fun when people do that, but you just can't let go of the handle bars, because you're sure you'd fall out. But you can't. You know that.

Any way you look at it, though, there's that thread running through everything, that silver thread that keeps everything bound to reality, and when you stop to sort it out, to try to get your beads on it (which makes no sense, really, because why am I talking about beads?) you realize how strange your life has become. The Lord knows best, we say this again and again, and even mostly believe it, but when you look back you realize that you'd never have chosen what He ended up choosing for you. Your life would have been tidier, with point A coming firmly before point B, and on and on and on it goes through the alphabet, ending with Z for Rapture (which makes sense, because the Rapture is the end of our earthly life, even though it doesn't start with Z at all), but here looking behind you, even if you're only up to the letter I, or maybe J, you can already see that life doesn't follow a human pattern even thus far. His thoughts are higher than ours? That's the only explanation. Plus, you are where you are (I am where I am) and somehow it makes sense. His ways are higher, and they're always better than the best (because only the best gets to be better than itself).

Which leads us to ponder, why don't we trust all the time? because if we can see, even now at the J or K stage of life, that His arms are always carrying us through, wouldn't it make most sense if we like Him do His perfect work all the time? Today, tomorrow, and even on alternating Mondays (though those are hard days due to life being what it is), we should trust. We mostly don't (I mostly don't, but you can judge for yourself what you do, and don't do or trust).

So that brings us back to the beads, all in their little boxes, all mixed up because we sin. All mixed up because we live. Living isn't bad, it's just messy. The peach of on part of life gets mixed in with the maroon, and we just have to face up to the fact that it's OK. That even when we don't sleep (which is often) we'll be OK. That's what concealer was invented for (even if you don't wear it, it's nice to know it's around), and that's what coffee was invented for (even if you don't drink it, and miss it, and sometimes wonder why you gave it up in the first place), and that's why people don't expect much from a tired girl. Somehow this has nothing to do with what I was first thinking of--

--when I woke up. Even though it's the middle of the night. They say wonders never cease. I wish ceasing would be the thing that happens to insomnia.